Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Barn Drama


So, the oldest horse at the barn got hurt. At night. On a Sunday. He was running with the other excited pasture horses when he tripped on his blanket and it flew over his head. Down he went and his front leg was trashed. It took a really long time just to get him from the pasture to the barn. It was pitiful. I was certain that he had broken his shoulder. The vet checked and checked him but couldn't find a fracture. The horse is so big and fuzzy you couldn't even tell if he was swelling or just puffy. They loaded him up with so many pain killers I'm surprised the horse could stand up at all. We decided to give him a night and see what happened. THANK GOODNESS by the next morning he was walking on the busted leg and much more comfortable. I was terrified for this horse. He's 34 years old. Hopefully it's just stall rest and lots of good food for him at this point. He is accepting get well cards;)

On a happier note...Christmas is almost here and I have a new kitten to share it with. Baby Rubble is bonding with Wallace (the grown Tom cat). They share the cat bed at night. It's so cute. I really need to get a picture up because she is a gorgeous calico. She bit me the first time I tried to pick her up (no sign of rabies yet). Now I can hold her without a problem. YEAH!

Quote of the Day: "Toby has been leaving radon test kits everywhere like he owns the place. The first time I threw mine away I thought it was an ant trap. But I figured I'd rather live with ants than with this creepy little disc. The second time, I thought it was one of those, you know, the things you turn over and it moo's like a cow thing but upon closer examination it was another ant trap so I threw it away. And the third time, I did it out of spite." -Michael Scott

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Winter


I've already decorated for Christmas. That's right. I'm DONE. Well, I was done until my mom found another box in the barn with my name on it. Now I have one more box to go through and see what I can junk my house up with now. John made me find a stocking for Wallace (my cat that has no distinguishable color). I'm not sure what to get him for Christmas. He already has a sparkle collar. He is due for a neutering (I'm talking about the cat). I'll spring that on him later. I'm going to try some crafts for gifts this year. My mom is the target. I feel sorry for her. Whatever I give her, no matter how terrible it, is she will feel obligated to display it in her house until the hot glue gives out or the cat attacks it. Poor her. I'm posting this song for her. When she looks at the terrible crafty gift she can play this song and feel a little bit better. Our family had to cancel Thanksgiving this year due the the plague that swept through. John got out with about a day and a half of it. The rest of us went to urgent care. It's been great fun. Oh, John is teaching Scout to not freak out when he shoots around him. We tried it on Thanksgiving morning with Lilly and Scout but Lilly didn't handle it well. Scout did great and John even was able to ride him while I shot caps around him. He did, however, wear 12 helmets. Horses are fun....dangerous and stupid...but fun.

Quote of the Day: "If you break that girl's heart, I will kill you... It's just a figure of speech. But seriously, if you break that girl's heart, I will literally kill you and your entire family." -Michael Scott

Tuesday, November 09, 2010

Something Funny

A few days ago I was having a bad day. Aaaand, when you're having a bad day you can always find something funny on youtube. Off I trotted to the internet and found this...

I laughed so much it hurt. Not so much at the model, but just listen to the anchorman. Our horse barn is beginning to fill up...slowly. It's a good thing because it takes me a while to remember the new names off horse/owner. I usually make up my own name for them anyways. I'll stop typing now because the video is worth watching 1,000 times.

Friday, October 29, 2010

Horse Show Wrap-Up



No horse show photos yet. I have to get up with a lady who has some great ones. We had a decent State Fair. Youth day went by REALLY quickly. I never thought I would utter those words but WOW! The kids made a great show. But, we were showing against world champion horses and riders. Whew! We barely made it out alive but Melissa was able to capture a ribbon. My qualifying classes were mediocre at best. Cole got fifth places Friday night. For some reason the second night is always better so I had some hope for Saturday championships. John and I went over to the fair after youth day on Saturday to waste some time before my classes. He won 2nd place in the hay competition! We took a camera to get photos and video of the horse show and came home only with photos of his hay and ribbon. He is so proud. We ate some junk and walked until we collapsed on a bench. Then, dragged ourselves back to the horse complex for championship night. Cole didn't place at all in his class. Lilly got a spectacular 3rd out of 3 in her qualifying class. I was ready to head home. I decided to finish showing Lilly in her last class anyway. I'm glad I did because there where more horses in the class and she was able to pull off reserve champion (for the second year in a row) and beat a horse we have never been able to beat before. As much as I love my horses I am still exhausted and don't want to see them for another week. They are happily back out to pasture and John is eagerly awaiting his ribbon and premium check in the mail. I might set him up a chair by the mailbox. So, I will leave you with a short training video of Scout. It's a useless video really but I have at least put one image of a horse in this post
video

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Ouch!!


I was walking through Kohls parking lot yesterday with John so that he could buy some cool guy shoes and I slipped. Remember that toe Daniel broke when he threw me in the ocean several years ago. I re-broke that toe. I didn't realize it until we went into Kohls and were checking out the guy shoes. We bought some for John and then he drove me to urgent care. John was cute and carried my big ugly green pocket book around as I was x-rayed and inspected by the doctor. They showed him how to tape it up and then gave me the coolest shoe...ever to wear for a week. John laughed at me all the way out of urgent care. This is really going to help me out a lot getting ready for the horse show. John won't even let me help feed the horses at this point. I'm going to try to sneak onto a horse today. First, I have to create a diversion.....
Oh, I have a new kitty. Have I already posted that? His name is Wallace. He hasn't yet been introduced to Ellie but the day is drawing near. I'm sure Cedar won't have a problem with him as long as he doesn't run. She has that hound dog chase after things that run down pat.

Quote of the Day:
Michael Scott: Pam you want to rub butter on my foot?
Pam Beesly: No.
Michael Scott: Pam, please. I have Country Crock.
-Michael Scott (The Injury)

Friday, September 17, 2010

Sigh


I'm tired. It's been a busy last few months. We've been showing the crap out of our horses and so have our students and boarders. I'm very proud of everyone. It's a lot of fun to take four horses to a show and have everyone come home with at least 1 blue ribbon and 2 horses win end of show high points. I broke out of my shell and took Lilly in a trail class (basically an obstacle course for horses). It was a lot of fun. We got 4th the first time through. We tried it a second time and by then Lilly had it all figured out. She won that class. It's good to get out with friends and family...and horses and just have a play day. We have a new cat that I can't find named Fred and a new kitten named Wallace. Both are very cute. I am so ready for cooler weather!! Maybe we'll have a fall barn party.

...excuse me as a solve a office paperwork mystery....

Quote of the Day: "Cumberland Mills? And how did you get my resume? Oh no no, I''m flattered, don't get me wrong. I''m just not sure it's my official resume, or if its just something a satisfied customer posted online. What does it say under martial arts training? Oh... okay, I''m going to have to supplement that. What''s your fax number?" -Dwight Schrute

Monday, August 30, 2010

Busy


So, it's been busy. I really want a steak...with blue cheese. Maybe I can talk John into that tonight. We've been gearing up for another horse show. This time we're taking Lilly. She doesn't really want to go but she does have to pay for her room and board. She does occasionally have to get out of the green pasture and work for her cushy life. I know I haven't posted in awhile. We've had a lot going on. I'm teaching some riding lessons and we've been active with church. The barn has gotten some new boarders and there are new ones coming in. Very exciting times. I hope everyone is doing well. We have a new kitty named Mustafa. He's completely crazy and probably the happiest cat I've ever met. Hopefully I'll have a picture up soon of him.

Quote of the Day: "Recently I have been thinking about maybe leaving this job, but I felt like I needed a sign. And then Ann broke up with me the week I was going to propose, the government got shut down and yesterday one of those pigeons took an poop on me. And I was indoors, so..." -Mark (Parks and Rec)

Tuesday, August 03, 2010

Horses Galore


We have new boarders at the barn!! We picked them up last Saturday from a nearby stable and brought them home. The horses seem to have settled it very well. We've not had much time to ride because we've been teaching lessons like crazy. It makes for long days but at least I'm tired enough to sleep well at night. I have a new kitten!! Cora from church brought a little black cat into the office last week that had been thrown out of a van. He is super cute and friendly. Almost a little too friendly. It's kind of psychotic actually. I'm thinking some medicine to calm him down would be appropriate. My other cat Rocket isn't real excited to have him on her porch but she's adjusting. Photos of crazy cat soon.

Quote of the Day: "I lied to Kevin. Holly and I can never be just friends. I wrote down, a list of bullet points, why Holly and I should be together and I'm going to find the perfect moment today and I'm gonna tell her. [quickly looks at crinkled note] Number one, "Holly, you and I are soup snakes." The-- and the reason is-- because, in terms of the soup we like to eat-- That doesn't make any sense. [checks note again] We're soulmates! Holly and I are soulmates." -Michael Scott

Thursday, July 22, 2010

WARM!


It's really stinkin' hot! I sit inside for most of the day so I shouldn't complain but come on! I joke with John and tell him it's all this "global warming." I don't think he's amused. He has to feed horses in the morning and then mow or stack or bathe or talk to hay most of the day. I help him feed in the evening and gripe about the heat the whole time. I've just diagnosed (because that's always a good idea) Lilly with Anhidrosis. "What's that," you ask? Oh, just a horse that can't sweat properly. Or doesn't sweat. Or sweats sometimes. Or overheats after walking around the ring. So, she's been doing nothing lately. I'm concerned about her. I have shows coming up but I just don't want to risk hurting her. VBS is going great. It's super hot and I have NOT been self diagnosed with Anhidrosis. I come home dripping. We are having fun though. The children remember the songs from last year and are really paying attention to the lesson. It's so neat to watch. Friday night is the Grand Finale. I'll be getting there early to test out the moon bounce.

Quote of the Day: "I got you one of those veggie muffins you're always eating. Tastes like a rug." -Andy (Parks and Rec)

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

No Rain

video
I love this video of Noah. Not sure what he's eating but it makes me laugh. Did ya'll get those awesome thunderstorms last night? Me neither. I get so excited about a summer thunderstorm and they never seem to happen. We are leaving Cedar out of her pen all day now. She usually comes out and barks all excited and then runs back to her dog house to sleep. Not very ambitious if you ask me. It's been too hot to ride horses lately and I'm starting to have withdrawals. There is no way I'll be ready for the next show as fat and out of shape as the horses are now. I might have to sneak down late at night and ride when it's cool. Martha helped me update my blog. I love the new background. Oh, and I ordered the wedding photo book from Christi yesterday!! Can't wait until it gets here!! VBS starts next week. That means a moon bounce happens on Friday at the finale. It'll probably thunderstorm that day.

Quote of the Day: "When you land, try and land like an eight year old. These bouncy castles are not designed for adults." -Dwight Schrute

Thursday, July 01, 2010

Who Needs A Ride?


Since it's been too hot to ride we've been doing other things. This picture was taken at Mike's birthday party at Kathy's house. I'd never experienced a Water Taxi until then. I'm glad Martha didn't take the picture when I fell out the bottom. Because it's been so stinkin' hot we've been turning Cedar out of her pen for most of the day now. She does really well. Ellie and Cedar keep cool by digging up our foundation so they can both have a comfortable place to lie down. Silly dogs! We finally were able to ride horses last night. There are lots of little baby calves that want me to pet them and name them and take them home. But, alas, John said no. Well, off to do paperwork...


Quote of the Day: "I was thinking about our little leak problem. I was up all night thinking about what we should do to this individual. You know what I think we should do? We make 'em come to work. And we work 'em. And, and we pay 'em. But, we make 'em feel like they did something really wrong. The one question I have is do we give them a Christmas bonus? I say, yes, it's Christmas, but right after, they're right back in the thick of it." -Michael Scott

Monday, June 21, 2010

Cool Beans

So, apparently I don't update my blog very much anymore. But, in my defense, it has been crazy busy...and...I don't have internet at my house yet. It's mostly been too hot to ride but we have been able to hit a few horse shows in the area that we've never been to before. It's been really fun! A friend I used to ride with 100 years ago (named Jessica...oh and her cousin Katie) have been loading up a variety of horses and trying them out. At one of the shows we were THE ONLY WALKING HORSES THERE! We got some strange looks but still came out with some pretty good ribbons. Then, we came across a show that was small with no dressing out required. We could even pick our back numbers!! I might have picked #1 for me and #2 for John. Oh, did I mention John showed!! I'll have more photos and perhaps a video later.
Fun Fact: Jessica's horse is full brother to the horse I sold the people who where putting on this show. So the whole show we had people coming up and petting her horse. It was a little strange. Even in the show ring during the judging they were doing it. Never had that happen before. It was interesting.




Oh, and we might have won a trophy or 2.



It was so much fun and I have so many slim jims left to eat...we'll be going back.

Quote of the Day: "I don't have 30 thousand dollars lying around. I have it buried very deeply, and I don't want to dig past a certain someone to get it." -Dwight Schrute

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

How To Lose Money-101


I went to a horse show and all I got was a urinary tract infection. It was one of the sorriest shows I've been to...ever. I took John and a friend of mine to help show. The person who inspects the horses before we show almost failed Cole because she measured his shoes wrong. Another inspector came up and had to educate her on how to measure. Apparently she was new. I should have loaded my little horses up and left then but NAY I continued like a dummy. The judge hated Cole. I wasn't surprised until I saw the video. My horse looked good! She wouldn't give him higher than last place. I was expecting Lilly to do MUCH better. She has been lately. The judge wouldn't place her at all. We decided to leave after my last class and not come back the next day. Well, the last class sealed the deal for us. Four horses in the class, she called our number as first place. No way. I knew something was wrong. I slowly made my way to the ribbon girl when I saw the judge talking to the announcer. I pulled back into the line up. The announcer said, "I'm sorry, we have them backwards. The first place winner is..." me again. I didn't move. She apologized again. Then she announced I was the winner. It got ridiculous. Nobody knew what to do. I got last. As soon as the class was over we made our move. We scratched all our classes and got our money back. The lady in the show office tried to convince us to stay. I won't be giving money to that organization anymore. Every show I have been to affiliated with the National Walking Horse Association has been a dismal failure. I shall waste my money (John's money) elsewhere. Another show coming up this weekend. Hopefully my medication has kicked in by then.

p.s.- John was a good sport. He even took video of all of my classes and yelled when I didn't win. I'll post some of that soon!

Quote of the Day: "Just once, I would like to be a puppet master and have nothing go wrong. Is that too much to ask?" -Dwight Schrute

Tuesday, May 04, 2010

Married Life



So, I did get my marriage license back so I am officially "with husband". I have been cheating on cooking lately. It's not that I'm lazy or don't want too (maybe a little lazy) but getting ready for this horse show has seriously taken a lot of time. Thank goodness there is always Papa John's to back me up. Every time we gain a horse at the barn we lose one too. We just got in a HUGE Canadian sporthorse but the brown mare and her baby will be leaving in a week. It kind of makes me sad to see them go. We get attached and all. Last night I went with John to a Home Owners Association meeting about some pasture work he is doing. That ran late and then we had to go to the grocery store. We got home late and I still need to pick headbands and braid ribbons for the show. John was a trooper. He sat on the couch with his eyes closed as I resparkled Cole's headband and braided fifty million ribbons while consulting him about the colors and how they would match my riding habit. I could tell he didn't really care but he acted like it...until he fell asleep. Tonight is another late night. Somebody come walk Cedar please!

Quote of the Day: "If you'd have told me this morning that today I'd be creating a monster capable of my own destruction, I'd have thought you were referring to the bull Mose and I are trying to reanimate." -Dwight Schrute

Monday, April 19, 2010

I MIGHT BE MARRIED!!


It's hard to tell really. Martha didn't know about mailing the marriage license in a set amount of time so I sent it off this morning. So, in about a week...I should know if I'm married! I can't thank everyone enough for the help setting up and taking down and eating all of the leftovers. It was so good to have a week away to re-boot. I hope everyone got some good sleep after the long hours of setting up. John and I moved 2 of the cats over to the house yesterday. We took Rocket and Frederic. We plan to take Stevie but he is recovering from some horrible/deadly cat infection that we had to deal with the week of the wedding (thank you to Miranda for handling THAT for me). As soon as I can get some photos up I will. Now I have to catch up on office work and eat my hot-pocket.

Quote of the Day: "I would say I kind of have an unfair advantage because I watch reality dating shows like a hawk. And I learn. I absorb information, from the strategies of winners. And the losers! Actually I probably learn more from the losers." -Michael Scott

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Honesty 101



Ok, so ten things...But, what if I don't have 10 things...

1. I'm getting married in few weeks and I'm scared. Mostly of having to run a house and having to not cook nasty food.

2. I eat burritos for breakfast...with hot sauce. (refer to honesty question #1)

3. I have kept most of my stuffed animals from childhood and they now reside in John's attic.

4. I like "Parks and Rec" better than "The Office."

5. I am WAY more competitive showing horses than I let on. I like to eat professionally trained horses for breakfast!

6. My hearing in my broke ear is getting worse. I make up for it by nodding and smiling. Maybe I should get chalk and a piece of slate.

7. I am afraid to have children. Labor mostly. Anything I can't put out to pasture and walk away from for the evening scares me.

8. My favorite day was the day John left for Iraq. Not like it sounds! It was the most meaningful day we have ever spent together.

9. I love living at home with my parents. I'll miss my left corner of the couch.

10. I think American Idol is stupid...yet...I continue to watch it...

Tuesday, March 09, 2010

Resuscitating Nemo



When Martha and Mike where in Ukraine you might remember I bought Noah a blue beta fish as a bribe to keep him happy. Well, my mom kept Noah yesterday for a few hours at the house. He was playing by himself for awhile and then he came in and told my mom, "I pet my fish!" What? Should I be worried? I didn't think he even knew how to get the lid off the tank! Maybe he just meant he fed his fish...or he looked at his fish. If he really did pet his fish we'll be needing a new one soon. As of this morning, Nemo seems happy. Let's keep it that way.

Wedding plans are winding down. Activities are cranking up. My mom found a new cat at my grandma's house. He needs a home. Cutest kitten ever born. He is getting tested for all things cat today and if he comes out ok he will be given to the first person who raises their hand.

Quote of the Day:
Michael Scott: Ho! Ho! Hooo! Contraption! She's contrapting...! Ok, you know what? I think that I should drive you guys to the hospital and here is why; I am a licensed, Class C driver in the state of Pennsylvania. I gassed up the car--actually I put diesel in this time, trying to save some money--
Jim Halpert:You shouldn't have done that.
Michael Scott:Happy to do it!

Friday, February 19, 2010

Cow Day!















Yesterday was cow day at John's farm. We started early and surprisingly we ended early. The cows decided to be cooperative (which is pretty much unheard of). We always have fun on cow day. The little girl cows get ear tags and the little boy cows, well, they get to not grow up to be bulls and live happy lives as steers. John only got kicked a few times by a mad little heifer that didn't want to be messed with.
Oh, the flowers for the wedding have been ordered. The florist was really nice and was much less expensive than what we originally thought it would be. We went and registered after that. That was fun. I did have to wrestle the scanner away from Martha a few times so I could try it for myself. Now, on to the cake. Georgia, I would like to meet with you. I'll find your email address and maybe we can set something up. How exciting!!

Quote of the day: "Jo, I don't know how things work in Florida. Which from your description sounds like a colorful, lawless swamp..." -Michael Scott

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

AND.....GO!


Dress, done. Carriage, done. Caterer, photographer, chair rental, pre-marriage counseling, hair/makeup...mostly done. I still have flowers (scheduled for tomorrow), registering (scheduled for Thurs-Saturday), and cake (not even close) left to do. We are less than 2 months out now so it's really time to get crackin'. The stress has set in. The only good aspect to the stress is that I have no craving for fast food. At all. Chips, yes. Not fast food. This week started off rough with John having to put Max to sleep and losing a boarder at the barn due to the trainer leaving. It looks like it could be picking up with several calls from new potential clients. On the up-side a lady came in the office and offered to help with the exploding feral cat problem. So, the root of all of my orange cats at my house is safely at the vet getting kitty parts removed and her ear notched. That was a huge blessing. The rescue is paying for all of it. No more blind kittens! Wow, I think I just got a craving for a taco.

Quote of the Day: "Well that's not the David Wallace that I remember. That, is some sort of... weird creature, that lives in David Wallace's house. Get me out of here..." -Michael Scott

Monday, February 08, 2010

He's Home!!!!!



He actually came home on Thursday afternoon but I've been too busy to post anything. We spent all weekend catching up with family and horses. Saturday night we had Christmas for him. It was a lot of fun. Now we are finally settling back in to everyday stuff...well...until the wedding stuff cranks up. This weekend John gets to jump back into working cows. I'm sure he's excited. We'll have plenty of pictures to share. Right now, I'm just glad he's around.

Quote of the Day: "I had a very good thing going with David Wallace. He was a good guy, was somebody I could trust. There he is. You can really see that he is ok taking a picture with me. Even though I was there for disciplinary reasons." -Michael Scott

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

En Route




By next week John should be trail riding Scout! I'm so excited. We just got the last of the boxes he sent home in the mail yesterday. Everything was covered in a weird dust. Today...we converted from Peachtree to Quickbooks. My accountant (a very patient man) blocked out 2 hours to get the job done. He came in at 9:00am and by 3:00pm the conversion was complete! I hated to waste his whole day...but...I wasted his whole day. I asked him 50 billion questions and I'm sure I'll have lots more. Maybe John knows how to print 941 forms. Now I'm playing catch up with my paperwork. Or, I could just leave for the day....

Quote of the Day: "There's a bunch of messages waiting for you about a bunch of things I don't understand." -Ron (Parks and Rec.)

Monday, January 18, 2010

Stupid Technology


I just got my new printer/fax/scanner/walkie talkie/riding instructor. They sent me a new one because mine kept saying "Deve Home Sensor Error." No one knew what that meant and after spending 45 minutes on the phone with a guy that was reading a manual to me they said they would send me a new one. Well, I just hooked the new one up and it said...immediately..."Transfer Belt Error," followed by "Invalid Imaging Unit" and "Invalid Yellow Toner", "Invalid Magenta Toner," "Invalid Black Toner." I called the people you're supposed to call when your office stuff dies under warranty and read him all of the error messages. I literally heard the i.t. guy have a stroke on the phone. Then he tried to sell me.......SELL ME.... a repair kit that was nothing but a plastic box for catching excess toner. I already have one. He told me to go empty it out. I told him I just had. He told me to go do it again. Just before I told him to make his mom go do it he followed up by saying he doesn't know what the problem is and that I need to call the distributor. Whatever. I called someone else and went through the entire saga again and he just put me on hold. When he came back he said the hard drive was fried and they would send me a new one. The brand new shiny never used printer's hard drive was FRIED. So, I have 2 huge non working printers sitting here in the office. They make you return the broken ones so someone has to have a car big enough to put the stupid thing in and drive it to the UPS store, twice! The one thing I'll say is that the people I've talked to have been super nice. But, super nice doesn't answer my faxes.

Quote of the Day:
"You just wait for next year's supply magazine to come out and find someone who's not dead." -Dwight Schrute

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

The Fuzzies



I've never liked the part of winter when my horses get scruffy. I've been trying to be a good mom and keep their hair braided and neat but it's becoming impossible. It's also been too cold to do anything about it. I'm so ready for warm weather. I love my new kitty...Brian's old kitty. She is working out so well. I'm extremely allergic to her but that hasn't stopped her from following me around the house and sleeping on my feet at night. She will be going outside as soon as it warms up but if anyone is looking for the perfect indoor cat (she is not declawed and will pick the heck out of your furniture) let me know.

Oh, the tables and chairs have been reserved for the wedding. One less thing.

Quote of the Day:
Bully: Give me your winter doodle.
Jeff: If you're trying to be menacing, maybe you shouldn't call the cookie by its name. -Community

Friday, January 08, 2010

Packin' Up


Guess who's coming home? In just a few more weeks I get to see my best friend again. I'm sure he'll have to "defrag" a little before he's presentable to the public. I'm very excited to see him. We have to do a marathon Christmas before we immediately move on to Valentine's Day! He thought running patrols was hard. Now he has to cram all the holidays he missed into about a week. I'll try not to overwhelm him but there's so much to do. And that doesn't even include finishing planing for the wedding. Hopefully by tomorrow most of that will be out of the way also. On a side note: how have the new taxes affected your paycheck? Stupid liberals.

Quote of the day: "My name is Ron. You don't need to know my last name. Whoever wants to talk, go ahead and we'll be out of here in a tight fifteen." -Ron (Parks and Rec)

Monday, January 04, 2010

Faces Of Christmas











I decided to ditch all the perfect Christmas photos everyone took during the season and show the family in it's true light. We had a very fun Christmas. Enjoy!

Quote of the Day: "Tom-cat, pull up a mouth. This buffet is unstoppable." -Ron (Parks and Rec.)